You can't talk about that

Let me tell you a Conservative Christian Love Story


"And then, after waiting and having no sexual thoughts for each other, they went through a courtship, held hands and had a lengthy engagement and finally got to fulfill the desires that they weren't supposed to have before marriage. And despite perhaps not being compatible... they lived happily ever after and finally didn't have to feel guilty."


Its actually a better bedtime story than genocide or human sacrifice... Gotta give them some credit!


It is time we talked about the elephant in the room. Sex.


...but this is a blog about skepticism and history? Why am I going there?


Because it's a big problem. Its a major issue in the evangelical church. And I lived through the purity movement and "I kissed Dating Goodbye" debacle. And I know how much the church focuses on "Bronze age" sexual morality. Not only that, but the equivalent view on women, marriage and reprimanding mistakes.


Remember, the bible is the inspired word of an almighty, all-knowing, ever present being (masculine.)


Except... we have major problems. For instance, Biblical marriage is not just "one man and one woman" but rather, one man and "x" amount of wives and as many concubines he can support. Rape is ok as long as the man is willing to marry the woman. If he isn't, she'll be stoned to death. No test for male sexual purity, but many cultures today still put out the bed sheets after the first night to make sure there is blood...


Even the basic premise of menstruation as an "unclean" state shows the complete patriarchal bias. Same sex attraction? Well, should we just play footage of people getting consumed by fire and brimstone? And tie it to the attempted rape of angels?


*sigh*


 Divorce? Only with certain criteria.


Abuse? well, a husband can't actually "rape" his wife... (still in the law books of some states.)


*sigh*


This doesn't look like a health textbook... because it isn't. Because it is a collection of writings from a different time! Because it is not something to live your life by!


Nothing causes more guilt and hurt that the area of sexual thoughts. That's my humble opinion. There is nothing more personal to a person than THIS area. And there's nothing that is more hardwired to our psychology!


Christian writers have declared that this is the battlefield of the mind, every man's battle... and its causing more pain than they could ever know. Because they are right (did I just say that) it is a battlefield if you are trying to play "thought police."


Its the basic principle of Christianity. Its not just the act of having sex with another person. Its thinking about it. Its acting anything out in your mind. That's sin.


Sinning against? Oh, I got this: God, your future oppositely-gendered spouse, your parents (probably) and also against the purity of that other person. Because thoughts... lead to... rape? Sex? adultery?


Well, I mean they could. But they could also just be... thoughts!


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How about a new bedtime story: "Once upon a time, two young people dated. They had protected sex, went out for ice cream, each masturbated, no kittens were killed. They decided they were incompatible and life went on. Maybe they'll marry someone... who knows... the end!"


Ah, that was a better story!